How Do You Find a Coach

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112
Chris Do
Published
February 18, 2020

You should see drastic improvement each time you work with a coach. Otherwise, I'm not sure that they know anything. Some other general rules, a lot of people say, I need somebody who can coach me who has this exact experience with these exact same kinds of clients. That's not true. It's not necessary. The good coaches will be able to coach you from any vertical, any industry because the same principles apply.

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Just how do you find a coach,how do you find a coach?I would ask people.That you know, that youlike that you respectwithin the local community.Ask around first.That's all I did.OK OK.Where do you live?Montreal, Canada oh, there'sgot to be some coaches out therenow.There's a lot ofjacked up coaches,and so you have to be careful.So you have to doyour due diligenceand ask lots of questions.Anybody, this is my opinion,and I just want to warn you,this is my personal opinion andDave Cote, chime in on this,please.Or anybody else hashad a coach thatwants to comment there and sharetheir own experiences is that Ijust don't like a coach whodesigns their services to bewith you forever.I want a finite start, and Iwant to find finite finish.I don't want it to be thisco-dependent relationship whereyou just give me enough to wantme to book another session.If you're doing yourjob, I'm getting better.I'm growing, I'm learning.I shouldn't need to be here.OK, if you havea psychotherapistthat you're workingthrough some issuesand it seems like it'sbeen five years workingover the same issues, youhave to say it's at themor is it me?But this combination ofthe two isn't workingand I'm the only me I have.Find another therapist.Sometimes they canbreak wide open for you.Same thing goes about coaches.You should see drasticimprovement each timeyou work with them.Otherwise, I'm not surethat they know anything.Some other generalrules, a lot of peoplesay, I need somebodywho can coach mewho has this exact experiencewith these exact same kindsof clients.That's not true.It's not necessary.The good coaches willbe able to coach youfrom any vertical, any industrybecause the same principlesapply.So don't worry somuch that if you'reunderwater basketweaving that youneed an underwaterbasket weaving coach,it's not necessary.They can do it aboveland or above water.OK, thank you.Yeah David Cole, you want to addanything to this because you'veworked with a coach to.Yeah, same coach.I don't know.I think it's a matter offit to because for me, Ihad the same coachesas Chris and I workedwith him for a couple of months,but just their personalitieswere not.That compatible I found.I think he gave some goodadvice, but it wasn't.I don't know.It was more of a personalitycompatibility thing.I think so.I think that samewith the therapist.When you're lookingfor a therapist,there's there's, youknow, you're not justlooking for a goodtherapist, but someonewho's kind of compatible.Personality to yours.Yeah so do you wantto get into thatdeeper without namingnames or anything?Dave, what you thoughtthe mismatch was?I don't know.I didn't feel like.The coach was as intune, like it seemed morelike he was imposingan agenda thathad worked for other clientsand on me versus really hearingmy scenario in mykind of contextand finding ways tonavigate through that.So yeah, and thenjust this stylefor me was a littletoo heavy handed.OK, so for you, it wasabout this cookie cutterformula that didn't conform toyou and you didn't like that.That wasn't theright thing for you.Yeah, I'm not saying you.I'm not saying he doesthat with everybody,but it felt a little bitpreachy, just like, yeah, kindof like a recipe,but I felt like hewas trying to tailor it.But it wasn't hisexperience or whateverwasn't wide enough to encompass,like the whole context.Did you work with another coach?No, I didn't.How come?I guess after that itwas a little trigger shyand didn't have as stronga referral because that oneobviously camefrom your referral.And so finding someone that Itrusted recommend another coachI hadn't found.So if you weresearching for somethingand you didn't get the answerto what you were searching for,did you feel like you solvedit yourself or you justbecame disinterestedor what happened here?Well, it was.I mean, I think the largerthing was I was going on a breakbecause we had a twins, and soit took some time off business.So it just cut that sortof just fell off the radar.And so when I came back intobusiness less than a year ago,I haven't really it hasn'tcome onto my radar again.Like, I'm trying to get sortof started with this groupand taking the content from thefuture and things like that.And that's beenworking OK for now.Mm-hmm OK are you tryingto get at something?No, I'm not tryingto get anything,I feel like if you'researching for somethingthat you shouldn't letone experience stop youfrom continuing to pursue it.Right, like if you havea really bad first date,it's like I'm nevergoing to date again,so the idea is you'researching for the right fit.That's all, so if theperson is not a right fitand I'll tell you, I'll usestronger, more descriptivelanguage than whatDave is using here.My business coach kicked my buttevery single time and sometimesbombastic ways.And basically,nobody talks to melike that except for my coach.It's like, whywould you do that?Like, this is what you do.This is what you don't get.Sometimes it felt like men.Are you listening to meor you following like,are you upset at somethingelse that it's nothappening here in front of us?But I let that wash over,because within all that stuffis stuff that was helping me.So I have an ability tosift through a lot of crapso that I can just collectthe nuggets, right?People go to conferencesall the time.Like, this conference sucks.That person sucks.That's this isthat's their mindset.My mindset going is somewherein here, it's going to be a gym,and I have to wait througha lot of junk to get to it.But that's my mission.So even though the speakeron this topic sucks,they're terrible.Oh, there's a keyboardshortcut I didn't know.I got something out of it.And that's been mygeneral life philosophybecause my wifewill ask me, like,why do you talk to that person?You don't even like them?Like, yeah, but I have alot to learn from them.So I can switchparts of my brainon and off, like I canbe objective to say,like there's parts ofour life philosophiesthat don't line up, and Iprobably would not generallyspend a lot of timewith you, but thereare good parts towhat you're saying,so I'll stay engagedfor this and.And I'm going to learnsomething from it.I'm fascinated byalso how you think,even though it'snot the way I think.So that's, youknow, just kind of,in all honesty, the coachthat we're talking about.Can be off puttingto a lot of people,because it's a lot of hardinformation coming at you fast,and if you don't likethat style or if you.You feel like bebeat up after it,it's probably nota good fit, so Isay, go find anotherperson that worked for me,it worked for me fora really long time.And I grew a lot becauseof it I just feltlike if I'm paying this guy todo it, then I shouldn't have.I shouldn't haveto be the one who'slike working hard to excavatestuff like, you know?That's fair.Yeah, that's fair.OK all right.I think that's it, it's10 o'clock, you guys.Thank you very muchfor jumping on this.I want to mentionone little thingbefore I end thiscall today, whichis a lot of you guysagree or disagreewith things on the protocols,which is totally fine.I encourage you to.Ask questions to sparkdialogue, to stir thingsup so that you canget clarity yourself,because a lot oftimes we go into it,and I know this frompersonal experience.I have a feeling sometimesmy ego gets in the wayand as much as I tryto zone things out,it still gets the best of me.And I may say things that Iagree with or disagree with.But after I havesome distance, I'mmore able to look at it froman objective point of view,and I'm happy tohear and to listen toand to participate, andmost importantly, to learnand change my mind.

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