How Do You Find a Coach

Just how do you find a coach, how do you find a coach? I would ask people. That you know, that you like that you respect within the local community. Ask around first. That's all I did. OK OK. Where do you live? Montreal, Canada oh, there's got to be some coaches out there now. There's a lot of jacked up coaches, and so you have to be careful. So you have to do your due diligence and ask lots of questions. Anybody, this is my opinion, and I just want to warn you, this is my personal opinion and Dave Cote, chime in on this, please. Or anybody else has had a coach that wants to comment there and share their own experiences is that I just don't like a coach who designs their services to be with you forever. I want a finite start, and I want to find finite finish. I don't want it to be this co-dependent relationship where you just give me enough to want me to book another session. If you're doing your job, I'm getting better. I'm growing, I'm learning. I shouldn't need to be here. OK, if you have a psychotherapist that you're working through some issues and it seems like it's been five years working over the same issues, you have to say it's at them or is it me? But this combination of the two isn't working and I'm the only me I have. Find another therapist. Sometimes they can break wide open for you. Same thing goes about coaches. You should see drastic improvement each time you work with them. Otherwise, I'm not sure that they know anything. Some other general rules, a lot of people say, I need somebody who can coach me who has this exact experience with these exact same kinds of clients. That's not true. It's not necessary. The good coaches will be able to coach you from any vertical, any industry because the same principles apply. So don't worry so much that if you're underwater basket weaving that you need an underwater basket weaving coach, it's not necessary. They can do it above land or above water. OK, thank you. Yeah David Cole, you want to add anything to this because you've worked with a coach to. Yeah, same coach. I don't know. I think it's a matter of fit to because for me, I had the same coaches as Chris and I worked with him for a couple of months, but just their personalities were not. That compatible I found. I think he gave some good advice, but it wasn't. I don't know. It was more of a personality compatibility thing. I think so. I think that same with the therapist. When you're looking for a therapist, there's there's, you know, you're not just looking for a good therapist, but someone who's kind of compatible. Personality to yours. Yeah so do you want to get into that deeper without naming names or anything? Dave, what you thought the mismatch was? I don't know. I didn't feel like. The coach was as in tune, like it seemed more like he was imposing an agenda that had worked for other clients and on me versus really hearing my scenario in my kind of context and finding ways to navigate through that. So yeah, and then just this style for me was a little too heavy handed. OK, so for you, it was about this cookie cutter formula that didn't conform to you and you didn't like that. That wasn't the right thing for you. Yeah, I'm not saying you. I'm not saying he does that with everybody, but it felt a little bit preachy, just like, yeah, kind of like a recipe, but I felt like he was trying to tailor it. But it wasn't his experience or whatever wasn't wide enough to encompass, like the whole context. Did you work with another coach? No, I didn't. How come? I guess after that it was a little trigger shy and didn't have as strong a referral because that one obviously came from your referral. And so finding someone that I trusted recommend another coach I hadn't found. So if you were searching for something and you didn't get the answer to what you were searching for, did you feel like you solved it yourself or you just became disinterested or what happened here? Well, it was. I mean, I think the larger thing was I was going on a break because we had a twins, and so it took some time off business. So it just cut that sort of just fell off the radar. And so when I came back into business less than a year ago, I haven't really it hasn't come onto my radar again. Like, I'm trying to get sort of started with this group and taking the content from the future and things like that. And that's been working OK for now. Mm-hmm OK are you trying to get at something? No, I'm not trying to get anything, I feel like if you're searching for something that you shouldn't let one experience stop you from continuing to pursue it. Right, like if you have a really bad first date, it's like I'm never going to date again, so the idea is you're searching for the right fit. That's all, so if the person is not a right fit and I'll tell you, I'll use stronger, more descriptive language than what Dave is using here. My business coach kicked my butt every single time and sometimes bombastic ways. And basically, nobody talks to me like that except for my coach. It's like, why would you do that? Like, this is what you do. This is what you don't get. Sometimes it felt like men. Are you listening to me or you following like, are you upset at something else that it's not happening here in front of us? But I let that wash over, because within all that stuff is stuff that was helping me. So I have an ability to sift through a lot of crap so that I can just collect the nuggets, right? People go to conferences all the time. Like, this conference sucks. That person sucks. That's this is that's their mindset. My mindset going is somewhere in here, it's going to be a gym, and I have to wait through a lot of junk to get to it. But that's my mission. So even though the speaker on this topic sucks, they're terrible. Oh, there's a keyboard shortcut I didn't know. I got something out of it. And that's been my general life philosophy because my wife will ask me, like, why do you talk to that person? You don't even like them? Like, yeah, but I have a lot to learn from them. So I can switch parts of my brain on and off, like I can be objective to say, like there's parts of our life philosophies that don't line up, and I probably would not generally spend a lot of time with you, but there are good parts to what you're saying, so I'll stay engaged for this and. And I'm going to learn something from it. I'm fascinated by also how you think, even though it's not the way I think. So that's, you know, just kind of, in all honesty, the coach that we're talking about. Can be off putting to a lot of people, because it's a lot of hard information coming at you fast, and if you don't like that style or if you. You feel like be beat up after it, it's probably not a good fit, so I say, go find another person that worked for me, it worked for me for a really long time. And I grew a lot because of it I just felt like if I'm paying this guy to do it, then I shouldn't have. I shouldn't have to be the one who's like working hard to excavate stuff like, you know? That's fair. Yeah, that's fair. OK all right. I think that's it, it's 10 o'clock, you guys. Thank you very much for jumping on this. I want to mention one little thing before I end this call today, which is a lot of you guys agree or disagree with things on the protocols, which is totally fine. I encourage you to. Ask questions to spark dialogue, to stir things up so that you can get clarity yourself, because a lot of times we go into it, and I know this from personal experience. I have a feeling sometimes my ego gets in the way and as much as I try to zone things out, it still gets the best of me. And I may say things that I agree with or disagree with. But after I have some distance, I'm more able to look at it from an objective point of view, and I'm happy to hear and to listen to and to participate, and most importantly, to learn and change my mind.